the littlest two

Three mornings a week for three hours I am on my own with just my littlest two. 

It's funny how just John Paul and Luke at home makes the house feel empty!  I'm settling into this new routine and figuring out how to make it work well.  I definitely have to fight the tendency to switch into overdrive mode and focus on getting a lot done with my *relatively* empty house :)

So this morning we went for a walk and I took photos.  Luke is confined to the stroller when we're out, not his first choice but he's resigned to it :(  He'd love to get down and get grubby but if you knew how filthy the ground was here you would never in a zillion years let him out of your grip.  In Thailand he loved crawling around outside but here.... not an option. 

John Paul, my man on the move, jogging up in front.  But, oh wonderful life skill learned... he is a professional at stopping when I call his name and he's so proud that he learned how to walk while holding the stroller.  

This is a game-changer in our toddler world.  Now that he is a stroller-holder we can go for plenty of walks, enjoy our freedom, run to our hearts content.... but when I need to exercise a little more control of the situation and John Paul needs to stick close to me.... well, he's holding tight to the stroller.  

And here's one of those times I was glad he's learned to stop when I ask him too.  For who did we discover at the corner store but two chickens (tied to a sign post, surrounded by cardboard, a few plastic crates, a pile of uneaten noodles in a takeout box, one electric three wheeled bike and an electric scooter).

This little store is the very first stop once exiting our apartment complex.... we're frequent shoppers, but the chickens are new additions.  The entire shop is the size of a single stall garage.  It sells more than you might think :) 

But not chickens.  I'm pretty sure they aren't for sale. 

learning to talk

I don't post a lot of video (mainly because it takes too long to upload!) but this one is just amazing. 

So I had to post it.  (And now I'm inspired to go back and post a Christmas video of Isaac that still makes Matt and me laugh out loud every time we watch it.) 

But first, you've gotta see this of John Paul learning to talk.  As a reference point, for the first six months he was home (pre cleft repair) John Paul only made about five sounds.  He used the 'm', the 'n' (less often'), the 'l' (even less than m/n), and occasionally a deep gutteral 'g' sound. 

He said only three or four distinguishable words, and rarely made any effort to use a specific word to communicate. 

That being said, he does use sounds/noises to communicate.  And he is a pro at combining his sounds with body language, hand motions, etc. to get his point across.  I sometimes momentarily forget he can't talk, because he is communicating so very clearly (at least to me). 

All that to say, in the past few weeks John Paul started trying out some words.  And it is awesome.

His cleft affected his speech development in huge ways.  John Paul never blew bubbles (like most 4 month olds) or babbled (6 months) or clicked his tongue on the roof of his mouth or any of those critical speech/language development milestones.  He's got a lot of ground to make up.  I think it's going to be a long journey, but we're gonna try to have a whole lot of fun along the way. 

It was a full weekend and I'm not quite ready for it to be Monday, but Monday morning it is... so here we go. 

All three big kids are in school Monday mornings this semester  (Matt no longer takes Mondays off) so it's a different feel for me.  I'll miss our Mondays together, but it'll be fun to have a more normal weekend too (when it actually happens, this was one of those weeks when Matt ended up working Saturday too). 

My absolute favorite is definitely when all five children are home, but I do like the different dynamics of different mornings .... they each bring such unique personalities to the mix. 

Recently these two have been great buddies. Julianna is sooooooo patient with John Paul.  More patient than I am!!!  Really it's a gift the Lord worked in her heart - she isn't always patient with her other siblings but she is tender and loving towards this little guy almost all the time.

7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 0

For about seven weeks a year these two families of children line up in perfect age stair-steps.  John and Alisa's three, right meshed in with our five. Ages 7-6-5-4-3-2-1-0

Today their Layla turns two, and in the next few months of birthdays we'll go from 7-6-5-4-3-2-1-0 to having two 7 year olds, two 5 year olds, and two 2 year olds (with a few others tossed in the middle).

Left to Right: Luke (0), Layla (1), John Paul (2), Isaac (3) , Zeb (4) , Lydia (5), Kayleigh (6), Julianna (7)

It's a gorgeous sunny day (oh so good for the soul to see sun and shadows and blue blue sky) and in just a few hours we're headed to a birthday party.

Good times.  And plenty of birthdays on the horizon (their family's and ours).

some rides bumpy. some rides smooth.

Okay I really think this is my last vacation post. 

Our elephant ride was a hoot.  Elephants are not comfortable rides, but they sure are interesting.  Bumpy, wiggly, jolting.  I cannot imagine riding one all day, or even all morning.  But I LOVED riding one with my kiddos.

Sweet Lydia looked up at me and said, "I bet this is John Paul's first elephant ride."   Me too, Lydia, me too.  

Getting on an elephant is easier than it looks, at least at this elephant camp.  Climb steps to a tall platform, wait for your elephant to "pull up" and step right on to her back.

The people we were with made the trip that much more fun.

And the river crossing at the end of the ride was certainly a highlight.

 

And so was feeding the baby elephant ....

So the elephant ride?  Bumpy.  Kayak rides?  Smooth.  Can you believe this is the ocean?!?!?  (Gulf of Thailand, technically)

Matt outdid himself toting different pairs of kids out to Monkey Island, down to the boat harbor, etc.

All our big kids loved the kayak.  We'll definitely do this again.  John Paul loves the idea of the kayak, but not the concept of sitting, and it's difficult to kayak if you don't sit well.  And Luke was too small for any of the life jackets.... I've got a good mental picture of Luke crawling off the end of a kayak though, so it's just as well. 

Give us a few more years and our whole family will be kayak-ready :)

We'll do another elephant ride too!

back to reality

One week (almost) back in reality. 

The big three will start in Chinese school on Wednesday. 

Our helper comes back this week (hallelujah!)

It's starting to feel normal around here again.

And I'm re-remembering a few things. 

1.  It takes so much longer to get out of the house in the cold weather.  So much longer.  So so so much longer.  I am grateful we have good winter clothing and stay warm outside.  But it does take a while to get out (mostly the two littlest boys).  

2.  Stuff here is cheaply made.  One month away and we returned to two fix-it issues; a leaky shower and mis-functioning hot water heater.  Matt fixed the shower and re-caulk-gunned his way through our bathroom :)  Our hot water heater has been giving us problems all winter.  The repair guy(s) are familiar faces.  They've been here twice in the past week!  Yeesh.

3.  Seeing the sunshine every day is a gift.  Pure gift.  I miss it already. 

I'm sleepy early, we've been fighting a nasty stomach something (maybe food poisoning) and there has been a lot of yucky stuff to deal with, night and day.  I *think* the worst of it is behind us. 

I still have a zillion great vacation photos so I might just sprinkle them here and there over the next weeks.
 

Isaac discovered a new foosball passion.  At the end of every meal he'd say "I'm full up to here [holding his hand at neck level]. May I be excused and go to the kids'  play area?"  by which he meant "I'm done with waiting around for this meal to be over, can I just go play foosball?" 

It was awesome.  Now he knows what he wants for his birthday.  I almost think Matt would buy him one too. 

love on Valentine's Day

Guess who called on Valentine's Day?

A woman who loved our family like no other.

John Paul's foster mama.

She wasn't calling because it was Valentine's Day.  (Hallmark holidays, though making considerable progress in this culture, have not yet penetrated the depths of rural Henan countryside living.)

She was calling because she hadn't been able to get in touch with us and wanted to wish us a Happy Chinese New Year.  And get an update on one of her favorite toddlers, of course!  [Note: I will never again leave the country without telling her first!  Oh I felt so terrible that she worried she had lost contact with us!]

Such gift to get to "share" this little boy with her.  We told her about his surgery, that he is making a bit (minimal, but still....) of progress in language expression.  Matt told her that John Paul loved the ocean and she was not surprised.  In her words: 他什么都不怕. ("He's not afraid of anything.")

Yep, same little boy we're talking about here :)

Oh, and the pictures we sent her in the fall?  She looks at them every night.  I'll be sending more next week.  And maybe some video or something?  She and her husband live in a very small village (less than forty homes, y'all - we found it on google earth and counted rooftops), so I'm thinking she doesn't have a lot of technology, but surely there is something....

And the news that made my heart soar?  She is fostering again.  A 7 month old baby girl.  Another orphan rescued from an orphanage and planted in a family.  A temporary family, yes, but a family nonetheless.

A piece of me wants to go get that little girl too.  I feel like she is John Paul's foster-sister (even though they never met, they do share a China mama, which is significant).  Adopting again isn't an option for us (right now) so I'll spend my time praying.  Praying that God would move and a family would step up and someone will bring that baby girl home forever.

How appropriate that she would call on the day we talk about LOVE.  (Although, honestly, other than her phone call the holiday passed us by with no hoopla this year... two days back from a month long trip and I was busy folding laundry and re-stocking the fridge and freezer.  The local store isn't selling conversation hearts or pink greeting cards and the craft-y side of me is still buried under piles of dirty dishes.)

But this lady, John Paul's foster mama, she knows love.  19 months of love and then to hand him to us for the rest of his life.  That's sacrificial.  She knew when she took his little 3-day-old body into her arms that he would only be hers for a while.  And she loved him with her whole heart anyways.

Six months in to this wild ride of bringing John Paul home and I can still say that every single day I see the benefits of his foster mom's love.  We spent one month on the road, one month of transition, and John Paul thrived.  We got out of the van at the elephant camp and John Paul literally ran towards the nearest elephant (I caught him before he bear-hugged the elephant's leg, which is what I'm sure he was planning on doing!).  He walks into the ocean, slides down the pool-slide, greets a neighbor.... with a confidence that love instills. 

John Paul's story is full of so much pain.  Abandonment.  Grief.  But in the midst of the pain there is love.  Love of a foster mama.  Love of an adoptive family.  And the perfect love of the Lord, who is writing his story.

John Paul's foster mama is my newest Valentine.



Other quick updates about our John Paul:  He is totally off his restricted diet except for a few random things (ribs, chicken wings or legs, anything bone-y which could possibly injure his newly repaired palate).  His palate is amazing!  He is starting to make some new sounds, but not many.  Even more encouraging is that he is (occasionally) trying to say new words - like cracker, Lydia, elephant.  They don't sound like much, but they are distinctly different from the few words he does say and I'm so glad he is trying to use his mouth to produce sound to communicate!  He is using a straw well (blowing and sucking) and bouncing around with enough energy to power a small country. 

We do see things that reveal just how deep some of his heart-wounds are.  John Paul still gets nervous during transitions.  All my children tend to get a little loopy when we pull out suitcases and prepare to hit the road, but there's a different edge, a different feel to John Paul's nervousness.  The perfect remedy seems to be to tuck him into the ergo (backpack carrier).  It's a short term phenomenon.  Nervous while we pack, content once we all get settled in the van, then nervous again as we unload at the airport, content once we're through check-in/immigration/etc and all settled in the boarding lounge.  One of the guards at security gave him a winning smile, he returned with a death-stare that clearly said "don't you dare try to take me away from my family".

Six months in and there is a routine, a settled-ness to having him in our home.  Not always easy, but it's incredible to think about how far we've come since August 6th. 

Luke-y Luke

My Luke. 

He'll be 11 months old next week.  When he crawled across the carpet at 5 months I immediately guessed he'd be my earliest walker.  But I'm re-evaluating.  His crawl is so effective he might just crawl to college.  He does cruise the furniture (or even the wall) and will occasionally stand without any support for a few moments, but when he's ready to move he drops to his knees and takes off. 

After almost four weeks on reflux medication I am sure he is making progress.  He eats solid foods - after months of occasionally tolerating baby food he now feeds himself just about anything I put on his tray.  Thanks to some allergy testing plus a reluctant start to solids I just skipped the whole concept of food introduction and feed him anything that isn't a choking hazard.  He seems to like it all.  Especially the ice cream :)

I do try to avoid things that I think might aggravate his reflux, like tomato based things, citrus fruits... but it's really just a guess based on what foods bothered me when I was pregnant and popping TUMS every night :) 

He also spits up much less.  Not never, but significantly less often, and less quantity, than before he started the medicine.

He cries out less at night.  The reflux medicine seems to be keeping him pain free, maybe doing a better job at night since he sleeps more soundly than during the day? This is a big deal and means that we *might* be able to think about moving him out of our bedroom and in with his brothers.  I'm hesitant since he is still my earliest riser, and honestly there's no way we could fit his bed in with Isaac and John Paul right now, but we're moving to a larger place this summer and I am dreaming of all three boys in one room :) 

And he sleeps (some) better.  A few times in the past month he napped for longer than two hours.  Most days one of his naps is at least an hour.  It might not sound like much, but for a little boy whose total daytime sleep hovered at about an hour, maybe 75 minutes, for months...... that's improvement. 

classic Luke pose - always sleepy (rarely asleep!)

According to his wonderful doctor, a Thai pediatric gastroenterologist (who spent three years at UNC), the medication will help in two ways.  First, it will control the acid reflux, helping keep the things he eats and drinks in his stomach, not moving back up his esophagus.  Second, it will allow his damaged esophagus time to heal - after months of untreated reflux Luke's esophagus is inflamed and irritated (possibly with ulcers?). 

So, I have to keep some long range vision here.  While I would LOVE to have him healthy right away, I am encouraged that we are on the right path.  Six months of medication, at least. 

He is a treasured little boy.  His four big brothers and sisters adore him.  He laughs hysterically at both Isaac and John Paul.  The girls tote him all over the place.  He is one tough little guy :) 

Luke is a LOUD talker (like we needed another one around here!)  At our last hotel in Bangkok we often walked past these strange looking mannequins in a store front and Luke would holler at them like they were real people.  He loves to make noise and being heard above the din is a priority for him.  It's awesome because it's such a happy noise, and so very loud, that you can't do anything but laugh.  I wouldn't give him credit for any "first words" yet though the kids are certain he calls me "mama".  It's tough to clarify, since "ma" is his most often uttered syllable, but they are sure he says it when he means me.  I'd love to claim it, but I'm not convinced yet :)

So that's the long update on my littlest baby.  (Who is no longer little, and quickly growing past 'baby'.)  A precious little guy, so so precious. 

travel days (or is it travel daze?)

Matt took this picture while we were checking in for our flight.

It's pretty much perfect.

Perfect in it's blurriness.  Travel days are not crisp clear. 

Perfect in the child-chaos.  Luke diving for freedom.  Julianna heading somewhere.  Me most often with one of the little boys in the ergo, one in the stroller.  [John Paul is actually best on my back, he prefers it and so do I.]

All six of us (me and the five children) tucked close together.  If there is one thing I say a hundred times on travel days it's this: "Stay close to Mommy."  

Perfect with the bags.  This trip we had three duffels.  Thank you airlines for taking our luggage early and returning it at arrival.  I cannot imagine air travel if we didn't get to dump our bags at the airport door.  Hallelujah!

We flew Thai Air (red carpet priority treatment to travelers with children) and let me tell you, they know how to love on families.  And I appreciate it :) 

You can't see it clearly, but Isaac's shirt says "My Dad is Awesome".  I didn't plan it, but it makes the picture that much more perfect.  Matt wins the Dad of the Year Award every time we travel.  He is amazing.  Just amazing.

Love parenting this crew with him.  On the road and at home. 

beach time

The beach at our resort was just about perfect.  Although it wasn't the most beautiful beach I've seen in Thailand (which, honestly, is kind of unfair to even compare because Thailand is home to beaches that will make you think you are dreaming they are so un-real gorgeous perfect white sand islands).... anyways, it wouldn't win an award in Thailand but it's still tops in our book. 

Tucked into a bay, some days the waves were so smooth it was like a lake (though there was one day of rough waves), clear water, shallow for a long ways out, great kayaking, tide pools filled with all the hermit crabs and starfish you could ever want. 

Sandy kids....oh the sand.  Sand Sand Sand. 

Check out how far out you could walk into the sea and still be waist deep.  Perfect.  That island in the distance was filled with monkeys.  Matt took the kids on kayak rides to go see them :) 

No surprise that this little man took to the beach like a fish to water. 

His big sis could never decide which was better, beach? or pool?  She calls it "the sea" and loved filling her buckets with all kinds of sand/sea creatures. 

One of the tide-pool days Isaac ran up and down, up and down, splashing and splashing in ankle deep water.  I loved watching him run, loved it. 

 Lydia, Lydia.  This time at the beach. 

And we were there with two other families that are good friends.  Their kids and ours played hard, together.  It was great. 

Kayleigh has been a big part of my girls lives since, well, since they were born!  This trip just added memories to the many, many times these girls have played in Thailand.  Kayleigh (and her two sibs) are practically cousins. 

There were plenty of boys around too.  They are tougher than they look.  I promise. 

Oh to sink your toes in the sand with a bunch of little kiddos running around playing their hearts out - it was a great vacation :) 

[ps - not pictured: Luke.  Have you ever taken a sand-eating, speed crawler to the beach?  He spent a bit of time there, but twice I left him with a 'baby-sitter' back at the resort and enjoyed some long, extended beach time with my big kids.  Perfect-o!]

Still, we did get a family pic, and he's in it :)

swimming swimming

Both my girls are swimmers!  Woohoo for them!  And for all of us!

To clarify: they do not freestyle the length of the pool :)  But they can make it across "the long way" on their own strength.  They can slide down the water slide, bob to the surface and head to the edge to pull themselves up and do it again.

This is a HUGE deal for my initially-water-wary little girls.  And I am so excited for them!

Isaac and John Paul are next on the "teach them to be water-safe" list (but it'll be a while before we spend so much time pool-side again).  Isaac decided he really likes a water slide and John Paul is so fearless that learning to swim is truly a life-giving lesson for him.  He keeps us hopping, so high energy and constantly on the move.

And Luke, another water-lover in the making.  We made it all the way til yesterday before he fell in the pool for the first time.  Remarkable considering his crawl speed and love of action.  (Don't worry, I was right there when he fell and fished him out pronto - his clothing was soaked but he was unharmed!)

Luke spent loads of time in his new float, getting pushed around the pool by all kinds of little friends.  (Our resort was small, filled with like-minded families, and I joked that Luke was the mascot.... loved by nearly everyone and I got plenty of baby sitting offers from the pre-teen girls - took them up on it too!)


Hours and hours and hours of fun!

oh sweet Thailand

Where do I start?

24 hours from now we'll be airport-bound, headed back to the Big Country :)  We have used 29 days of our 30 day tourist visas..... it's been a good trip.

The first two weeks were work-full (especially for Matt, less for me).  The final two weeks?  Mostly play.  We decided that since we were already here we might as well go ahead and use up some vacation days!

Such a treat - such a sweet break from some of the specific stresses and demands of life in China, a wonderful time together with our family and friends, a gift to play in SUNSHINE every single day, and a blessing to get out of the "fishbowl" for a while.  [The tourist industry is so large in Thailand +  we stay on the beaten path = no constant paparazzi taking photos and stopping our family to ask questions and generally making it difficult to blend in.]

We spent the last 12 days at a resort designed specifically for folks like us -  beach front with a water-slide equipped pool.  Julianna wanted to live there!  It was perfect.

Really, the entire trip has gone so very smoothly.  Very very smoothly.  Our housing always been more than adequate - double rooms the first two weeks (one had a kids' room with an underwater theme and beds that looked like boats, so cool) and these last two weeks we had a three bedroom cottage!  I think it was just about as big as our apartment back home! 

Last night and tonight we're squished into one hotel room.  I'm pretty sure it wasn't designed with our family in mind, but we make it work well :)  Julianna is sleeping in the closet (her choice) and Lydia under the desk (again, her choice).  Baby Luke is doing really well at night, so that makes sleeping-with-seven truly a viable option.  [Although we tend to wake early when we're all stuffed in one room, 6am this morning..... but our hotel room overlooks the Chao Phraya river so we opened the curtains and watched the river come to life with boat traffic which made up for the early wake up call!]

Loads of photo-heavy posts to come, along with an update on how Luke is doing, John Paul *finally* off his restricted diet, lots of swimming, and a bit about our elephant ride too. 

Stay tuned.  I'm back :) 

what we do on vacation

We forget what day it is.  I can't guess how far "behind" I am at blogging because I'm not even positive its Friday.  (Is it?)

We don't have internet access.  Or at least not without some effort.  And seeing as how I'm not putting much effort into figuring out what day it is, I'm definitely not putting much effort into finding wifi.  (though I did today, because I was desperate to get some specific emails)

We eat a lot of popsicles.  More than I would like for you to think we eat. 

We read a lot of books.  At least I just started on this one - reading Heidi to my children and about to finish up novel #2 for myself.  [If novel #2 doesn't sound like a lot of books just remember: I have five young children on vacation with me!  I used to finish two novels a day at the beach.  Now I'm just grateful I can find my kindle when I have a moment to read!]

{Yes, even baby Luke eats popsicles.  There are some big (often sugary sweet) perks to being baby #5.} 

 

We swim - in the ocean, in the pool, sometimes in swimsuits, and one thrilling time the kids plunged into the waves in their clothes.  

We have a lot of fun.  We have little friends to play with and other mommas to talk to and card-playing buddies and nowhere we have to be before February 10th. 

I might blog again before then.  But I might not.  I guess if I can ever figure out what day it is then I might even upload some photos :) 

[These popsicle eating shots were taken the night Luke and I returned to Cha Am after our marathon doctor-appointment days in Bangkok.  My Isaac said "I was hoping you were going to be back right after we finished breakfast but you didn't come".... everyone was missing each other and it felt so good to be all together again.]