finishing the first month

Here in Asia the first month of life for a new mother and baby is a HUGE deal.

Babies rarely (maybe never?) leave the house for the first month. The most frequent question I get asked when I am out with Isaac is, "has he finished the first month?" And my answer is usually "almost" or "soon" - which is typically met with a look of horror. How could I dare bring my baby outside when he has not yet "completed his first month"?!?!

But I think folks are even more shocked that I am out and about. New mothers are really 'protected' for the month after they give birth by all kinds of "shoulds" and "should nots". The list is long and extensive and varies depending on who you ask, but here is a brief version of some of the things a new mother should/should not do:

Should NOT shower (no, I am not kidding - no shower for a month!)
Should NOT be outside.
Should NOT be anywhere windy, and should especially avoid wind blowing on her head.
Should NOT open the windows in her house (presumably to avoid the wind problem?).
Should NOT expose her ankles.
Should NOT drink cold liquids.
Should drink the soup made from boiling bones and ginger for three or fours hours.
Should rest and rest and rest some more.
And the list goes on.....

Usually the thought of following all these rules makes my skin crawl. No showering? Laying in bed and resting for days on end? No taking Isaac outside to enjoy the sunshine and breeze?

But I do have to admit that they are grounded in some good concepts. A new mother does need time to rest and recover. A new baby is vulnerable and should be protected.

And then there was the day that our helper was (again) emphasizing the importance of following these rules (she never stopped trying to persuade me, even when I brashly drank a cup of cold water just moments after returning home from the hospital). Isaac was four or five days old. It was about 9am. The breakfast dishes were still on the table. The floor was covered in crumbs. The girls were running around having a grand time - spreading toys and chaos in all directions.

And our helper said, "When I had just given birth, I spent days lying down, someone brought me all my meals in bed, and I just rested".

And I thought, "You know, that sounds like a great idea. I'd like to crawl under the covers and right now and have someone wake me in a few hours to serve me lunch on a tray!"

Mostly though, no matter how you choose to spend it, the first month of a baby's life is amazing. Full of many precious moments and sweet memories.



Tomorrow Isaac and I officially finish the first month.

Now I can proudly announce to all bystanders and curious passer-by: "Yes, he has finished his first month!" And they'll probably think, "No wonder she's smiling so big, she's enjoying sunshine for the first time in a month".

And the fact that I've been outside enjoying the sunshine for weeks now and am smiling because God blesses me immensely with my three precious children will just be our little secret!