one thousand stories *part 3*

There are hundreds of ways for John Paul to entertain himself at foster mama's house.  Pumping water was a favorite for everyone.

also, tools.  and dirt.  check.

We wrapped dumplings for dinner.  But first, foster mama needed to make her own dough wrappers, using a clunky old noodle-making machine that was plugged into several different lengths of extension cord and tucked into the corner of her neighbor's storage room.  (Do I need to clarify that the neighbor was also a relative?  As far as I could tell most everyone was related in one way or another.)

Then back to her house to wrap the dumplings.  She was never entirely satisfied with my girls handiwork, or her granddaughters either - she has a bit of a no nonsense-ness about her and shoddily wrapped dumplings were not on her list of approved items!  But poorly wrapped dumplings or not, she was grinning the entire time.

Time to light the fire and John Paul was here to "help".  This was awesome because she pulled up a little chair and instructed him to sit in it and said "when you were little you would sit right there while I got the fire started".  This time around John Paul was hankering to feed the fire himself.  And after this, every time that fire got started there were plenty of children around, hoping to help.  Julianna and Lydia fed corn cobs to the fire for an hour on Monday!

Dumplings, boiled in cornmeal soup. I'm not sure how to describe this in a way that makes it sound appetizing, but it was delicious!

After dinner we loaded back in the van and headed to the hotel in a downpour.  We were exhausted.  But also delighted to be planning on another day with foster mama tomorrow!  

one thousand stories *part 2*

Sunday morning, waking up at our hotel in NanYang.  It was unseasonably cold, and rainy, and we were nervous.  We walk to the lobby and there she is, waiting....

John Paul wasn't sure what to do, or if he wanted to be the center of attention, or how to respond to her.  It was an awkward first hour, for everyone.  She had driven to the hotel with her son and oldest daughter and we all went to find some breakfast.  After a local specialty (beef noodle soup, which was delicious but I could hardly eat a bite) we dropped her daughter off at work and started our drive into the countryside.

John Paul was starting to relax.  The privilege of riding in the front seat of our van in his foster mama's lap sealed the deal.  {Don't worry, this might not be the safest way to travel, but it's perfectly legal - and in this case, worth the risk.}

Matt drove our van and I rode with her son and Julianna and a live fish (lunch) and a number of other interesting implements that a countryside farmer would have along.  Xiao Zhao (her son, who is two years younger than me) talked the entire drive... I was fascinated, learning about this part of the country and their lives and what they plant and the Chinese term to describe rolling hills (丘陵地带 ).

They just harvested winter wheat, and planted corn and peanuts.  Also hundreds of peach trees and family gardens.  This is fertile territory!

The countryside is spotted with small clusters of homes (villages) and interspersed with some larger "towns".  Foster mama lived in a village with about 15 homes, all built in a square courtyard shape.

On the right - kitchen and store room.  In the rear (up those steps) is the living room and two bedrooms.  On the left is farm storage.



The bed on the right is where John Paul slept (with foster mama) in the winter. In the summer he slept in a little cot in her room or on the other bed with his foster sister (who I am now determined to find! she was adopted a few months before John Paul and foster mama thinks she is in America).

She was so proud to show me she had framed some of the photos I've mailed to her!

FaceTiming my parents (that's the front door behind us).

We went on a walk through the village and down to a man-made reservoir.  I could not stop asking her questions and loved hearing all about life in the village and life with John Paul!

The sign marking the entrance to their village :)

At one point John Paul approached the two of us to show us the bug he had in his hands.  Before I could say "he's always catching bugs!" foster mama jumped in and said "oh when he lived here he was always catching bugs!"  Confirmed my suspicions that his love for all things farm and country and dirt and fire and tools and sticks started young.  You can take a boy out of the country, but you cannot take the country out of the boy!

She wanted to carry him down on her back "just like she used to".  They often walked up here after dinner.

It started sprinkling on our way back to her house and continued to rain for the next two days.  Sigh.  John Paul is sharing an umbrella with Zhao Ya Hui, foster mama's granddaughter, who is his age.  Zhao Ya Hui (and her older sister Zhao Ya Tong) was a big part of John Paul's early childhood.  Foster mama told some funny stories about John Paul bopping Zhao Ya Hui on the head when he wanted some of her food :).

Back at home Xiao Zhao and his wife were cooking lunch.  Yum.

Keeping John Paul fed is a full time job - my boy has a big appetite!  I cannot imagine what it was like to feed him in his early months with his cleft lip unrepaired.  I do know foster mama was a busy lady!

Trip to the bathroom.  They have a water pump and some indoor plumbing in the kitchen and for a washing machine.  But they haven't upgraded their outhouse.

Street in her village

Feeding the baby chickens...

Me: When he was little did he help you feed the chickens?
Foster mama: Yes! He squeezed one to death!!! After that I had to keep a close eye on him!

I laughed and laughed!  Squeezing a chicken to death is exactly what I would have guessed John Paul would have done!  And she and I both know that "keeping a close eye" and "John Paul" always belong in the same sentence!

The entire time we were there she called him Dang Qi Wen (his orphanage-given name). By the end of the two days he was lifting his head and looking for her when she called his name.  Even Julianna was referring to him as Dang Qi Wen when she talked about him with foster mama.  The entire family (foster mom and dad, and her children, and her grandchildren) called our kids "Jie jie" (big sister = Julianna), "Mei Mei" (little sister = Lydia), "Lao San" (number three = Isaac), Dang Qi Wen (John Paul), and "Lao Yao" (local dialect slang meaning baby of the family = Luke).  

Foster dad.  This has got to be the sweetest Chinese man I've ever laid eyes on.  He smiled just like this our entire visit.  Such a gentle voice and kind eyes and quiet spirit.  He's not in great health (has recently had several stints put in his heart) and I could not understand him very well.  [I was shocked at how well I was able to understand foster mama... I was so grateful the Lord allowed us to converse so freely and easily.]

I've more stories to go, but stopping here for today :).

one thousand stories *part 1*

I could tell a thousand stories about the past few days.  They have been incredible.  More than we ever hoped for or dreamed of.  It will takes days to blog it all, but I will.  Because I hope I never forget these moments, and I know my memories will dim.

The best place to start?  The beginning :)

Our first hours on the road (Friday evening) were smooth and we made much better time than expected (this is, without doubt, the BEST way to start a road trip!)

One quick night in an, ummm..... average Chinese hotel and we were back on the road early, bound for Henan.

The roads are wide, and smooth, and very lightly travelled.  China has invested heavily in infrastructure in recent years, including interstates (inter-provinces?) and we definitely benefitted!  We've spent more money on tolls than on fuel but let me assure you, it was worth every cent!

I've spent hours on mountainous journeys through the northern and western parts of our province and these roads were so much better than I was expecting!

Finally, about 5pm and it was WELCOME TO HENAN!

John Paul spent his first 19 months in a village outside of NanYang, Henan.

Matt and I (and baby Luke) travelled to Zhengzhou, Henan when we got John Paul.  We also drove from Zhengzhou to Nanyang (over 4 hours) where we stopped briefly to apply for John Paul's passport, meet his foster mama (for about ten minutes), visit the hospital where he was abandoned and then drive right back to Zhengzhou.  It was one of our hardest days ever.  No one should take a 9 hour road trip with a 4 month old infant and a toddler they adopted the day before.  But it was what it was, and we did it.  Anyways, I was glad to be back in NanYang for a longer visit, and in less stressful circumstances.

We got to Nanyang, checked into the hotel, ate dinner, and got all our people tucked into bed.  Then we called John Paul's foster mom to tell her we made it.  She asked if she could pick us up at 7am the next morning!  She was so excited!  We suggested waiting closer to 8am and went to bed with a big day on the horizon!

rushing into June

Well I still haven't posted about my birthday, and it was a big one :)

But June is here and it's going to go in a hurry, so I'll have to go back and add in my birthday post when I can.  For now, here's our story -

We leave today, as soon as Matt gets home from work, headed north.  It's road trip time!

Almost 5 years ago Matt and I made our first trip to Henan (with baby Luke in tow), to get our John Paul and bring him home.  We briefly met his foster mama, and we have been able to stay in touch with her over the years.  And now, we are going to visit her!  It's exciting and nerve-wracking, and filled with emotion, and (we dream) so so valuable for John Paul as he starts to understand and own more of his own story.

We drive four hours tonight - north and east - and booked a hotel in a smaller city along the way (still in our province).  Tomorrow we have another 11 hours on the road and will spend the night in Nanyang, Henan.  His foster mom lives in a village about an hour out of town, and we will spend Sunday and Monday with her.  Then, "on the way home", we will drive through Xi an, and see the terra-cotta soldiers and a few other important sights.

So it's a big trip, and it's coming at a big time, and we've already had an emotionally loaded week as we started saying some goodbyes (friends we will not see again until next January/February).  And the Chinese highway system is much more developed than it was ten years ago, but it's still not my favorite way to travel.  I'll be packing the computer, and hope to blog some along the way.

Off to do the final packing and then we are off!

another medical Saturday

In anticipation of an upcoming surgery we took John Paul back to the hospital where his palate repair surgery was done.  This hospital did a fantastic job, and the surgeon is top in his field, but it was a hard, tough, arduous time for our little family, and I've been in no hurry to return. 

Surrounded by siblings is definitely one sure-fire way to mitigate fear and apprehension.  These four are part of the original John Paul fan club, and his big sis Julianna is especially tender-hearted, and defensive, and you do not want to cross her path if you have any ill-intent towards John Paul.

There Julianna is again, keeping close watch on his speech therapy eval.  "He did pretty good, especially because it was all in Chinese", was her educated opinion.

[Personally, I think he is doing well, but when he gets tired or lazy he looses some of his harder sounds like /v/ and /f/ and I'm definitely planning to have an eval done in the States.  My dream is that he 'barely' qualifies for therapy - I'd love for a little extra speech support, and insurance will cover it if he qualifies!]

Many hard hours in this hall with my stressed out, traumatized, hurting little boy.

This is the step-down unit, on the far left side is a bank of windows looking at the nurses station.  He left the OR, spent about two hours in ICU, and then met me here.  We were the far bed on the right.  He was heavily sedated, with blood occasionally coming out of his nose and mouth.  Even when he opened his eyes and looked at me I got the distinct feeling I wasn't who he was hoping for (he had only been home about four months).  Oh, and his pulse ox kept slipping and the alarm kept sounding and the two of us were A WRECK!

But we made it!  And if what doesn't kill you makes you stronger... well that might explain part of the iron-clad attachment the two of us currently enjoy.

The attending surgeon looked at his mouth and thinks we are still at least a year away from needing to do his bone graft.  We will get a second opinion at UNC in July.

And now, for John Paul, we are going to take a little break from medical Saturdays (dentist last week, hospital this week is plenty for my guy!)

Children's Day (Luke)

Luke's preschool class did a Children's Day performance, and my little man was pumped.  He's nothing if not confident, and the stage did not intimidate him one bit.

He was pretty proud of this ancient Chinese warrior outfit, and especially the spear that he carried ("it's real, but not for hurting people" was his comment)

Waiting stage left with his adoring fan club in the wings :) This was after his official performance before marching back up on stage for a bow.

I love this picture.  Those soaring high rises are our apartment complex.  You can see the watching crowds, and also the backside of the teacher who dressed up like a life-size warrior (as opposed to a 5 year old sized warrior).  Luke is the blond, obviously.

Yay for you Luke!  What a great show!

throwing them out the window

I hope that one of the ways my kids describe our homeschooling experience is "fun".... so we are fully committed to throwing our completed school books out the window!

Nothing says "last day of school" quite like a good heave of a workbook, or the growing pile on the ground below.

They stand on a chair to get better leverage ;)

I thought about having them come back upstairs and look up the word "cathartic" in the dictionary, but I figured a dictionary might ruin the moment, so we'll save that one for next year :) ha!

And the 2016-17 school year is over.  I have two rising 6th graders, and a rising 3rd grader (and a rising 1st grader, and a rising K)... but it's a bit more complicated than that because Lydia will join a 5th grade class with her age-peers this fall, and eventually I hope to put John Paul and Luke in the same "grade" as well.  But homeschooling allows flexibility, so we are going to work with what we've got :)

F-O-R-T-Y

Can you believe I'm 40? Can I believe I'm 40?!?!  It seems crazy but it's true.  And I'm loving every minute.

I went away for a night with four of my closest friends - we sat in the club lounge at a fancy hotel (thanks credit card points!) and soaked in the hot pools and ate and talked and laughed till our sides hurt.  It feels like lavish blessing to have ladies like this in my life.  I love each of them so dearly and they are better friends than I deserve.  Way better.

And my kids treated me like a superstar and Matt took me on a lunch date and we all celebrated with key lime pie (made by Isaac and Matt) and it was incredible, just all the way around a great birthday.

With very few pictures.  ha!

these little two still shop for me at the convenience store next to the gate of our complex.

I'm grateful to live in a place where they can spend their meager savings and exercise a little independence AND come home with something I'll enjoy. win win win!

Here's to 40 more :)

NO Pencils Week

NO Pencils Week is off to a solid start.  It's an easy win for this homeschooling momma - outlaw pencils, and it's hard for the students to find fault with your plans :)

We are focusing on a deep clean and purge of the school porch.  And it feels so good to my low-clutter loving self! It's one of those "things must get worse before they get better scenarios", so don't be fooled by the photos!

NO Pencils week is headed for a big interruption - my birthday is tomorrow!

figuring out those teeth

So yesterday we made a last minute decision to visit the dentist.  It's just been in recent years that we have had reliable, western-standard medical care in our city, and one of the perks is that this country is a lot more laid back about making appointments :)  Call in the morning, teeth cleaned that afternoon.

Only the little two boys, Matt and I needed cleanings.  But that can still make for a long wait.  Plan ahead for the win.

Also, that precious little smiling face right there in the red shirt... well, on this dental visit we confirmed that his mouth is a wreck.  sigh.

He is starting to loose baby teeth, so we did x-rays and he is indeed missing several adult teeth (of course he is... that section of his gum line never formed in utero so there was nowhere for the teeth buds to develop).  And now that he is loosing teeth he is needing a bone graft surgery, and after the surgery he will need some sort of dental bracing device to provide front teeth while he grows to maturity, and then some permanent false teeth.  In other words, that's a complicated grin you've been admiring in the photo above.

Good news is this boy has a Momma and a Daddy that are going to fight hard to get him what he needs when he needs it!

Also, he finally got his hands on the Bible we ordered as his reward for finishing reading the Beginners Bible.

This Bible had a complicated journey through Eastern Europe and several different hand-offs and just arrived in our city this weekend.  Now it's secure in his hot little hands, and he's feeling pretty good about that!

five days, five pictures

Another week in the record books.

This was a biggie!  Our last "real" week of homeschool for the year!  The girls finished 5th grade and Isaac finished 2nd!  Next week is No Pencils Week and we will clean out our school porch and gather all our important things-to-keep and put them in files and create mini portfolios of our work to take to their teachers for next fall and throw a few books out the window because it's just soooo very satisfying!

Isaac finished much of his school work last week and this week was very light for my little man.  He spent hours working on this lego creation.  and I mean H-O-U-R-S!

Kicking off the spring sports days at local school (I got these two photos from class chat groups).

I'm thinking there was a color-coded pom pom thing?!?

There is always lots to talk about on the playground (for the mamas, and the kiddos)

Home school happens in the ..... HOME!  The boys working on perler bead creations, Lydia with her head in her spelling book.  All three homeschooled kids have desks on the school porch, and they do the majority of their work there, but there is definitely a bit of migrating around the house too.  A change of scenery helps, if you can resist the distractions!

And now it's Friday night and Matt is on a late night flight home and we have NOTHING planned for tomorrow except for enjoying having our Daddy back at home!  yay!